blessing in disguise

Moving on part 2.

meeting an ex-bf would always be toxic. there were nuances of past romance which allows the formal courtesy to vanish. there were unanswered yearning sense emerging from everywhere.  the pain and anger might have subsided.. but love was not easy to control. it's calling you.. and making you wish it would be re-embodied as soon as you want it to be...

the meeting carried together your smell.. the thing i couldnt get over with so easily.. however it evaporated quickly by the time i reached desk.the work would flow endlessly. every hours spent before the screen was never enough. it was difficult to get time to get your smell into my thought. it'd been too full with data sheet and urgent phone calls. by the end of the day all i want was a pack of good rest without any dream. surprisingly you werent in it either.

priceless experience came at high price. the actual job desk went beyond the one written on paper. but it was lovely. as a student, everything read in text book can be seemed surreal. as junior professional, being able to see the text book unfold and played before my own eyes was beyond my wildest imagination. everything i could only read in text book, now happening live, and i got to see it with my own two eyes. it was splendid.

then came the business trip.. oh it was lovely.. until life was nothing but the trip... people would hunt the extra income. but for me it was a prison. how could you be happy visiting a place and only see airport, hotel, souvenir spot and airport again? so the money wouldnt even entertain the travelling spirit. after few months all i could thought was to go travelling on my own.

but of course the world is not a perfect place. the classic 101 of office negativity was all around. the bullies were one thing. but unappreciation was rather unacceptable. whether it was just part of being in lowest supply chain or something else.. it was still driving my motivation away.

and by the end of the first year... i couldnt recollect the moment i was still so into my ex. surprisingly i woke up feeling myself at a whole. more than that was the decision to move further with my career. but i would never forget what this job had given me. a whole new me.